Self-Esteem: Where Does Your Self-Worth Come From? To successfully navigate life, pursue the correct objectives and content, develop happiness and well-being, and satisfy oneself truly, one requires high self-esteem.
Therefore, self-esteem is crucial to who we are as people. It’s also crucial that the reference be authentic, meaning that it can’t be distant, idealistic, or even deluded.
However, a low sense of self-worth is all too frequently covered up with alcohol or other drugs. This is effective in the short run, but the drawbacks vastly exceed the benefits in the long run.
But first, let’s address the query of what, psychologically speaking, self-worth and self even imply.
Self-esteem is both a component of who we are and is fed by other aspects of who we are, such as the internalized Self-concept. Self-esteem is a result of both internal and external input, and it has to be replenished or refreshed, on a regular basis.
Our total perception of ourselves in terms of our looks, appeal, personality, intelligence, morality, victimization, and all other significant aspects of who we are is known as our self-concept.
How we see and assess ourselves as people is also a part of the notion of who we are (husband, wife, son, father, etc. in our roles and functions). The foundational components of our self-concept are learned in childhood, and during the course of our lives, they are refined and expanded.
Therefore, self-esteem is a fundamental facet of the self-concept that we must cultivate and uphold throughout our lives.
In general, it represents our significance to ourselves and our emotional and affective relationship with ourselves.
It’s important to have a balanced sense of self-worth. Low self-esteem is a sign of despair, helplessness, and dependency, whereas extremely high self-esteem comes off as egocentric or exaggerated.
Self-Esteem: Where Does Your Self-Worth Come From?
When it comes to self-esteem, reality is crucial. It must be relevant to the person’s actual skills, attributes, and traits. This calls for input from others (partners, friends, coworkers, etc.), as well as, in certain circumstances, feedback from strangers (e.g. a therapist).
Mistakes and failures can also lead to higher levels of self-esteem. It is based on how the failures are handled. These should inspire rather than be devastating. Having self-esteem is all about having a realistic yet optimistic picture of oneself.
Self-Esteem: Where Does Your Self-Worth Come From?
The Self
The ability to see and manage oneself, as well as to successfully interact with others, is a function of the Self. In this sense, relationships and communication both start with the individual.
A person’s self-image is created and managed by their self-representations, or by their perceptions of their own experiences and realities. The self is unable to reflect, in contrast to the ego, the personality’s center. To grow and adapt, it needs the “supply” of the ego.
This makes the development of a critical self an important responsibility of the ego. The self is given the resources to grow realistically, positively, and healthily through the corresponding intrapsychic activities of the ego, such as perception, thinking, learning, and remembering.
This enables it to grow while still acknowledging its constraints. Self-confidence and self-esteem are developed through ongoing feedback cycles between the ego and the self. In this process, something that is consciously available to the self is known as self-knowledge.
Self-esteem is closely related to happiness and fulfillment.
Self-esteem is another essential element for pleasure and fulfillment. Humans are particularly sensitive to real and perceived dangers to their safety.
We only need to believe that we are being undervalued in order to push back and defend ourselves. On the other hand, self-esteem is something we commonly desire.
This is demonstrated in the work, performance, and assistance provided by others so that they can reward us positively (with praise, assistance, or affection). In general, the pursuit of self-esteem is beneficial and positive as long as it does not result in excessive or unrealistic self-perceptions.
For us humans, it is particularly unpleasant and difficult to handle the constant or even repetitive exposure to our own failings. That is why we often choose to stay away from such circumstances.
Behind this is a tremendous desire to fit in and be acknowledged by others. Accepting criticism is challenging since it is rapidly connected to devaluation and dangers to one’s self-esteem due to this desire for unwavering acceptance from significant individuals. To be accepted and leave a mark, requires a very solid connection and a delicate touch of criticism.
Many people use alcohol or other addictive drugs as a coping mechanism when their well-being is compromised. This might be the start of a vicious cycle in which there is a self-esteem issue, alcohol or drug usage has a short-term, beneficial effect on that issue, and then the self-esteem issue reappears once the influence of the substance wears off.
The fact that self-esteem deficiency might worsen each time a drug is used is another issue. Over time, this creates a vicious cycle in which increasing amounts must be ingested in order to fill the emptiness that is subjectively felt.
Self-Esteem: Where Does Your Self-Worth Come From?
Our views, attitudes, and opinions are the products of the experiences we have had throughout our lives. They have an impact on our actions, emotions, and perception most of all. They resemble a filter that is placed in front of our eyes; everything we see is seen through this filter.
Therefore, it seems to reason that if this filter is clogged, or if it includes more negative thoughts, then we will also likely interpret everything that occurs to us as being quite negative.
We all have diverse experiences, thus it stands to reason that there are numerous unique distinctions here. We frequently come with depressive persons who believe things like, “I’m worth nothing,” “I’m unlovable,” “I’m a failure,” and similar statements.
However, the good news is that we can try to fix it. Identifying our beliefs allows us to gradually challenge them: “Is this belief actually true? Do you want to keep holding this viewpoint? What benefits and drawbacks exist? or “Who would you be if this belief didn’t exist?”
Then, we may progressively shed outdated ideas and improve our sense of self-efficacy, regaining control and selecting the lens through which we wish to see the world.
In conclusion
Naturally, this is a process that takes time to complete. We may give ourselves a considerable amount of flexibility in this situation since, after all, it took years for the beliefs to develop and it will probably take some time for new beliefs to replace the old ones.